Dear Roommate: SHUT UP.

Roommate, I genuinely do like you. We both like video games and obscure pop culture references and Family Guy. You totally don't care when I keep the lights on at 2 AM to write a paper while you're trying to sleep. Usually our room is fairly quiet, and that is essential to help keep me focused on my work.

But now that we're into our second semester, I think I've realized the difference between us. You, dear roommate, have no concept of what the volume level of an inside voice is. When someone gets you talking, you do not stop. You will go on to great length if the subject matter interests you, and at great volume. and when neither of us are talking to each other, as is the case right now, you are online, talking to people on Skype with your headset mic. while I appreciate the fact that I don't hear both sides of the conversation, I hear your side. Very loudly. As far as my knowledge goes, you've been at this moment sitting on Skype for upwards of three hours. THREE FUCKING HOURS. And you do not stop. I have a bad eardrum from an incident involving firecrackers when I was 12, and every time you let out a yell in protest of something the person on the other line has said, my eardrum aches in excruciating pain.

Sure, you get quiet for a while. But suddenly like a wave you come back again, giggling or arguing loudly with the person on the other line about whatever arbitrary thing you want to discuss. And I understand. We all need to contact home once and a while: you know perfectly well that I call my mother every evening, because when I don't often times she worries about me. But I can't call my mother, when you have the TV going, AND you're talking extremely loudly on your laptop. Just because my headphones are on my ears doesn't mean that I'm drowning you out with music. I don't talk on my phone while you're talking to someone, and you KNOW I go to talk to my mom for at least ten minutes every night. Can I please have my ten minutes?